Friendship and popularity most serious concerns of children

16 Jan 2004

Peer relationships, intimidation and harassment are big issues for New Zealand children as well as children overseas, says Grant Taylor the Executive Director of the Kids Help Foundation.

Commenting on a NZ Herald article, “Deadly Vengeance Creates Cult Heroes” (16/1/04) Mr Taylor said New Zealand had not seen school violence on a par with Colorado’s Columbine High School killings, but there are good reasons to be concerned about the social world of the Kiwi schoolyard.

He said recent figures from the What’s Up telephone counselling service for school-aged children and young people showed that concerns about peer relationships and bullying were the leading reason for calls in 2003 and accounted for 36 per cent of all problems dealt with by the service.

“Since What’s Up began in 2001, we’ve answered more than a quarter-million calls for help and advice. The number one issue for children and young people are their relationships with other children and young people. Bullying – by itself is the second most serious concern of young people.”

“The problem seems to be getting worse, with a significant increase in the proportion of calls about peer relationships between 2002 and 2003,” he said.

Statistics gathered by What’s Up clearly show more calls are received about bullying at the ends of school holidays…“which in turn reveals the anxiety about bullying that many kids face on returning to school,” he said.

Mr Taylor said New Zealand-based research showed mounting evidence that children are exhibiting signs of significant problems in their social and psychological development. The Otago University longitudinal child development study shows 25 per cent of New Zealand children have experienced a mental health disorder by age 15.

“A large proportion of mental health problems involve anxiety and depression and these disorders are strongly connected to the quality of young people’s social and emotional relationships,” Mr Taylor says. “There is good evidence that anxiety and depression in primary school years greatly increases the risk of severe mood and conduct disorders in teenage years and later in life.

“There’s a lot we can all do to help kids develop good social skills. It’s important that adults do not model aggressive behaviour or tolerate bullying.
“Parents should support and encourage their kids to make friends and play with other youngsters. They should keep an eye on the children’s social relationships and look into what is the matter when they have concerns.

They should talk to their kids about whether they’re being bullied at school and look out to see if there are signs that their children are bullying others.
“Childhood is a time of rapid learning and kids pick up quickly on what they see going on around them. Adults need to set good examples and show they care when they see a distressed child, a shy child or a bullied child,” Mr Taylor says.

What’s Up offers a free confidential nationwide telephone counselling service for all children in New Zealand. It is available between noon and midnight seven days a week on 0800 WHATSUP (0800 942 87 87).