Friendship angst – number one problem at helpline for NZ kids

27 October 2005

Making friends and keeping them is top of the list of problems raised by callers to What’s Up, a free, professional telephone counselling service for children and young people nationwide.

“More than a quarter of the calls we receive from children and young people seeking help are about friendship,” says Grant Taylor, Executive Director of The Kids Help Trust Foundation, which runs What’s Up.

“They call because they’re having problems making and keeping friends, falling out over other friends, feeling that they don’t fit in ...and often feeling very anxious, hurt and lonely because of it.”

“Relationships with other children are recognised as being a major factor in children’s social and mental development and how they eventually function as adults. Some studies have found that the single best predictor of how well people do as adults is not school grades or classroom behaviour but how well they got on with other children when they were young.”

Calls on bullying are a close second among the problems brought to What’s Up and, like other problems in childhood relationships, bullying has been found to have potentially very serious effects on the health and well-being of young people.

“When the Foundation launched What’s Up four years ago, we felt there was a real need for young people and children to be able to talk about and learn how to resolve these sorts of everyday challenges, without having them brushed away as inconsequential or feeling that by talking about them they would be shamed or face retribution. We felt it would be best to provide help early rather than have to pick up the pieces after a crisis.

“Our trained counsellors are skilled at helping children and young people learn techniques that will help them resolve future issues as well as the problem at hand. And we regularly get calls and letters from those we have helped, thanking us for the difference it has made in their lives.”
After a difficult financial period last year, What’s Up has climbed from strength to strength, thanks to sponsorship from Griffins, White Pages® and Child Health Services Trust, operational support from Barnardos New Zealand, funding from Child, Youth and Family and public donations, as well as tremendous commitment by Board members and staff.

Today an average 1,500 calls are made to 0800 WHATSUP (0800 9428787) every day – three times the number coming in two years ago. “We have recently taken on new counselling staff but are still falling behind in meeting the demand from kids for What’s Up.,” says Grant.

“The willingness of thousands of children and young people to call What’s Up is both a reflection of modern times and the confidence of young people about using the telephone as a counselling medium. But more importantly, it is a reflection of the high level of trust and confidence young people have in the service which has delivered great value to them for over four years now. What’s Up has done no promotion of its service to children and young people since it launched in 2001. The growth has come from word-of-mouth recommendations from friends, schools and other organisations in the community.”

“What’s Up could be doing much more if it had sufficient funding. The calls are free to the kids, but of course there are significant costs in delivering a professional level of service. We would be delighted to hear from anyone wishing to help ensure that the What’s Up lines are open for kids in need.”

Anyone in New Zealand between the ages of 5 and 18 years wanting free, professional, confidential help with any issue can call 0800 WHATSUP (0800 942 8787) between noon and midnight any day of the week.